How Come If I Can Fuck a Baseball Bat, Six Inches Hurts?

Its like i reset to virgin. Its kind of annoying.
See i've learned a certain appreciation for oversized as unusual toys. (My toolbox makes people wince.) Beyond a free freaky big insertables, there have been bottles, cans, rubber fists (real ones too but i don't keep those in my closet) and i even have my own baseball bat.
So why is it if i go without for just a couple days even my smallest dildo feels likei have a tree trunk in me?
Its hurts like the first time over and over. I'm pretty sure I'm not a vampire. I shouldn't be regenerating.

Seriously, No Power In The Verse Can Stop Me

Discipline is not always a matter of sexuality. 

I reached this really frustrating plateau. I stopped losing weight and then it slowly started to tick back up and up.  Between the chronic pain condition and the hormonal issues, I felt like I was swimming upstream with just Weight Watchers alone.  So we hired me a personal trainer and I started jogging.  One would think the pounds would start falling off.  But the increased activity had me carb craving and I was not sufficiently controlling that.

So a few changes were put in place.  Cut down the carbs, reshuffled how I used my points/calories, increased the anti-oxidants, kicked up the run pace a bit (though that was a matter of my muscle tear healing more than anything else) and lost over 6 pounds in a week.


 Back in the saddle again.

Zombie Apocalypse vs. Alien Invasion

If I had to pick the end of the world scenario I would prefer I would have to say I would prefer to be stuck in a zombie apocalypse.  This came about as a result of watching both Walking Dead and Falling Skies.  I would certainly prefer an end of the world scenario in which the thing attempting to kill me was mindless to one that had superior technology and possessed the ability to strategize.

In either scenario one cannot underestimate the value of skateboards.  It allows scouts to move faster and further and to transport any heavier supplies they may come across. And they told me those misspent parts of my youth would never do me any good. 

Rule 1 - Cardio.

Why can they bring back Knight Rider but not Firefly?

Life Rocks

Today I came home from getting my nails done to find homemade bread and blackberry jam.  Drool. I will have to run extra hard to burn it off but it is SO worth it.

Attention Ladies

Why is it that when a man makes a very specific statement or answers a question with a very specific statement, so many women try to figure out what he "really" means/thinks/wants.  I can't tell you how many times I have been subjected to this analysis.

Here's a thought.

He meant what he said. If he said he isn't thinking anything, he probably isn't.  If he said he is thinking a thing, that's what he thinks.

If you're the kind of female I am, and this question makes you insane, from now on when another woman asks you what you think a man really thinks/means, just punch her in the head until she shuts up.

What are you seeking?

Its a question you get a lot on kinky websites.
Not "What are you looking for?", not "What are you into?"... But that ultra pretentious "What are you seeking?"  The funny thing is that most of the people that ask in this seemingly "high protocol" or formalized fashion have clearly not taken the few seconds it would take to ascertain from the profile they just messaged that i'm owned. As in not single. As in not "seeking", but following. Owned and collared and not up to me.
One would think asking what i'm seeking is respectful. However, in my case, when i'm clear and upfront about my status, how is disregarding that completely anything but disrespectful?
And they're always shocked when my response isn't "polite".

What's Up with the Nazis?

As if I needed another reason to stop frequenting fetish websites...  I keep stumbling across nazi shit on one.  I feel like Indiana Jones.  "Nazis.  I hate these guys." 

I am half German and part Gypsy.  My great grandparents and grandparents lived in the midwest USA by the 1940s.  So no, I don't have relatives I knew that were involved.

I hate nazis because they are nazis and they suck.

Running Related Cunt Injuries

My time this morning sucked! Partly i wasn't really motivated. Partly i didn't use my brace. Partly it was oppressively hot and humid. Also, i shaved yesterday and since i shave everything, it caused this sort of insane itching. The first thing i did when i got in the door was pull my running pants down. But, since i hadn't taken of my shoes, this led to a strange shuffling trip thorough my kitchen.
I seem to be at least part vampire. I normally run at night. I sunburn at the speed of light.  Like an idiot, i went out without sunblock. I won't be running during the day again.

I do not buy gold.

I'm not for rent, sale or lease.

I do not have space available.

I am not open.

I do not do palm readings.

I do not have 2 4 1 drink specials.

I do not offer golf lessons.

I'm not accepting new campers.

I will not wash and wax your car for $14.

I do not have an ATM.

I have not moved to a new location and I'm not inviting you to join me there.

I do not have bingo on Wednesday.

I still don't sell gold.

I don't give the first month free.

I am not my commute.

Seriously?

Take a character that is very popular on a show for her attitude and make her into a mindless zombie eating machine?  Brilliant idea.

Its a lie you know...

The bit where it says daughtry indigo powered by Blogger.  daughtry indigo is powered by massive amounts of caffine and a strangely realistic sense of hope a lot of people do not seem to understand.

I am more comfortable facing reality than I am trying to force myself to successfully play make-believe on a consistent basis. Its why I am an atheist.  Its also why I don't use the label "Gorean"(same concept, different dogmatic cult).  Its why I am perfectly comfortable viewing myself as middle aged.

Which is why I find the sudden rash of messages asking me about "breeding" totally confusing.  Ok lets skip the part where I am married and my husband might have a little something to say about me getting knocked up by random internet strangers.  We can also skip the part where I don't do unprotected sex outside of a fluid bonded relationship with someone I know has been tested.  Or the part where I have had surgery that eliminates the option.  Let's go to the bit where I am a little long in the tooth to be getting pregnant.  Do these people have any idea how much greater the chances of catostrophic birth defects are for women over 35 years old? 

So Game of Thrones comes to a season end and TrueBlood returns. I love this show. It has completely departed from the books, I still love this show.

Nothing In The Verse Can Stop Me...

I have had my first post muscle tear training session (ouch by the way) and my first real 30 minute run (well, more walk/jog/limp). I survived. I am a limping pile of sore muscles like it was my first workout ever, but I did it without ripping anything new.

I am choosing to ignore the well meaning but misplaced advice to quit or revert to laziness. I am not looking for a way out, or a way to be ok with quitting. I intend to reach my goal. Some days are easier than others. It is kind of annoying though. I get the "quits" when I say nothing. Heaven help me if I mention I am tired or sore or something hurts. (Which I will basically simply stop doing. People wonder why I don't talk much anymore.)

There are people who run full marathons after they lose a limb. I tore a muscle. I won't be weak forever. Unless I keep sitting on my fat ass thinking up excuse after excuse. Or using the ones people are all to happy to give me.

On the other side of the coin - my husband, who set up the ice cold water and warm bath I came home to following my run last night is the best man ever in the entire history of the world.

New Zombie Apocalypse Plan

I live close enough to Miami (Ground Zero) for zombies to be a concern. I don't want my face eaten. So like any responsible person, i have a zombie apocalypse plan. 

Admittedly, a lot of this involves the ability to out run my husband. Marriage can be defined as loving someone enough to want them around close enough and often enough to be likely to be there in the event you need zombie bait. Ok sure, there's the love, the trust, the great sex. But that zombie bait thing, that's important.

So i have my bait... Ummmm husband... There to protect me. Step one.

Originally a group of us were going to meet up at Home Depot. I'm re-thinking this plan. Mostly because my best friend had moved to an island, on a military base. Isolatable. Well armed. This seems like a good idea.

Until i watch the Romero films again. Islands don't go well.

Ok, well, there's the prison idea ala Walking Dead.  (If you've only seen the AMC show - read the books.) But you have to survive the initial riots. No.

Boat? Haven't read World War Z have you? Hell no!

Bomb shelter? Maybe. We're short on them in South Florida.

I haven't worked out all out yet but given the headlines I'd better.

OK so that happened... and mental notes

So things are getting back to normal post mega-nasty muscle tear during a training session. I can walk again.  I am going to try running again next week.  I tried this week. Not so much.  I still have plenty of time to train for my goal, though, so it shouldn't be an issue.  My trainer was able to start me working again this week on everything except the muscle group I tore.   

The original Friday the 13th has Kevin Bacon in it. How did I not remember that?