BDSM Socialism and Trickle Down Slavery

I have seen this more times than I can count.  Being told that my M/s relationship involuntarily subjects me to some form of socialism.  Sure, it isn't stated that way.  Mostly because those making this baseless assertion are usually not the type to fully think through, or often even fully comprehend, the wide ranging effects of their assertion, 

The thinking seems to be centered around that all slaves/submissives/bottoms owe deference to all masters/dominants/tops.  This seems to be a primarily online phenomenon.  Likely because even the most socially retarded of folks have learned that walking up to a total stranger and demanding deference because you have arbitrarily assigned yourself a position of authority based on their relationship to a third party, will simply get you laughed at.

In an online medium, the socially retarded become brave.  No more intelligent or worthy... simply more demanding.

My owner put hard work into mastering me.  He did not do that so that a so called community/lifestyle of random strangers can reap the benefits of his hard work.  He is not a socialist.  The Marxist concept of "From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs." doesn't apply to my M/s relationship.  


His ability to master me was not applied to meet the need of those that are unqualified and fundamentally incapable of doing so.


The ability of one spectacular man to bend me to his will does not trickle down to others.


The default position of everyone that isn't my owner is an equal one.  However, evidence of rampant idiocy will lower that equal position to an inferior one, regardless of the self-styled position those inferiors have arbitrarily assigned to themselves.  


There also seems to be a pervasive inability to describe the circumstance which would compel my deference beyond the sophomoric "Cause I say so."


One I have been "threatened" with is physical compulsion.  Let's ignore the laughability of this in an online environment for argument's sake.  And the all too often fundamental physical inability of many making said threats.  (I am, after all, a mean amazon who learned to fight from skinheads, and an ass whuppin is not completely out of the question.)  Given my stated "not a slave to all" philosophy, physical compulsion would be a crime, temporary and illusory.  A gun to the head does not a Master make.  

I can't be sexually compelled.  I am monogamous.  I don't actually have a compelling sexual interest in anyone except my owner.  So seducing me is a dead end.


As stated, this is primarily an online phenomenon.  An intellectual medium.  Not a situation which would incline me to deference to my inferiors.  As a purely statistical fact, that would be .06 of the global population.  From that .06 of the global population, we narrow it to that portion that speaks the same languages I do.  Then further narrow it to being members of the same online websites.  Then further narrowed to those I come across.  


What are the chances?


Even given that statistical impossibility, the fact that my M/s life is not an M/s lifestyle (I am privately owned property) if one was the rare unicorn, it STILL wouldn't sway me to a position of automatic deference, because there is still that "I am not a BDSM socialist" hurdle.  One would have to put in the same level of hard work as Master, and as he does not share, that isn't going to happen. 

It Is What It Is

I'm happy with my M/s relationship. But I don't need to make it more. I don't need to have it be spiritual.  I don't need to say M/s makes my relationship deeper, more meaningful, better than vanilla ones. Its deep, meaningful and best for me.  It is what it is. I'm happy with that.

Rehab of a Screamer

I'm loud in bed. This is a problem for parents. Bring on the gags!  But this still requires a bit of stifling and concentration on my part.

But I'm sure in the end it will be possible. Retraining to ask first worked. I'm improving.

And I'm always up for more "practice".

The First Amendment

It would seem that the focus of the Freedom of Speech has undergone a radical change in America. Right now there are 1st Amendment violations going on in our country. The erosion of free speech is a big deal. Not that most people seem to care. Or even have noticed. I don't really agree with the Occupy Wall Street movement. I am, however, deeply disturbed by the government actions against it.  You don't see a lot of people standing up to say "That's not right!"

Where are those people?  Home, online, complaining in chatrooms and the like that their 1st Amendment right to post unmoderated and uncriticize on 3rd party sites. On the radio, complaining they lost employment when they spewed racist crap on their boss' airwaves. 

Not protesting Veterans getting brain damage and old lady's getting a face full of pepper spray.

I wish every idiot who spewed some ignorant idiocy about the 1st Amendment were forced to take a Constitutional knowledge class. But mandating ignorant people learn because they said something stupid would violate the 1st Amendment.

Sigh.

Mental Notes

1.  It hurts to carry a box to the car with sore nipples.

That is all.

Bond... James Bond

I remember a LONG time ago my friend B describing making a woman orgasm as making you feel like looking in the mirror and saying "Bond, James Bond".  I can relate.  My owner had some pretty varied experiences by the time I was collared.  Scores of women.  I will admit - I have a certain degree of "Bond, James Bond" being at the top of the list.  Master has actually been with women where he could simply stop having sex, without bothering to get off.  That has never happened with me and, all these years later, it still doesn't. 

I love being the only one who has ever been able to consistently get him off orally.  I love that pat on the head "You are SO good at that" sense of accomplishment.  But most of all, I love being able to give him with that same legs shaking "DAMN!" orgasms that he gives me.   

I love to make him happy.  There are a lot of little things, day to day.  But sex is a part of that.  Our unflagging sexual energy, the better part of the way into a decade, the ongoing to ability to catch and hold each others' interest without feeling that 7 year itch... I have a very happy life.

Holy Fuck, Are You Fucking Kidding Me?

The only way Jerry Sandusky could be creepier is if he spent the next interview rubbing a stuffed animal against his crotch.

Disney Whore

You know its love when someone will spend 4 days during the holidays in theme parks with their in-laws.

He loves me.

A Lot.

It was fun. Normally we go in early December but we decided to do Thanksgiving in Universal this year. Even with dropping my points count I lost 2 pounds. Of course, I walked 8 hours a day and got sick as a dog one night.

My bff called me a Disney Whore. She has a good point.

Dear Dumbass...

No, khmer rouge is not makeup.

Dear...

Person In The Breakroom Telling Me They Can't Have The Poppyseed Bagel Because They're Afraid They'll Fail A Drug Test:

Well, I hope you're happy. Now I have douche chills.  I want to pry open your yap and stuff that bagel down your throat. Not to get you "bagel high", but with the sincere hope you'll choke to death and I will never be subjected to another thought that's leaked from the empty head.

I'm sort of hoping you get struck by lightning. I realize I'll likely suffer severe burns if not death as a result. But really, its worth it. Or maybe a rabid panther. Yes. While you babble on I'm going to silently pray that a rogue rabid panther somehow gets into the building, then up on the elevator, through the lobby and here.  Now. So it can eat your face. Then I will follow the ambulance to the hospital because I want to see them put you on a morphine drip. It doesn't have to be a panther. Is that face ripping chimpanzee available for rent? 

We Should Reconsider Impaling People

I think we walked away from impalement too soon. Vlad had a good idea that I think we can work with. I think we should line the road leading to Penn State with the people responsible.

I'm not a football fan. So I really don't get how a fucking game can be more important than not letting someone rape kids. But step 1 is no more football until you Penn State monsters get your priorities straight. Their little game was so important that children were sacrificed to it, its time to take their little game away.  There was a riot to protest there being repercussions for creating a pro child rape environment because it interfered with football?  Its a fucking game! I think that's a pretty clear sign that the Penn State folks are either so stupid or so evil that they can't worship their litte game anymore. That's it. Time to refocus your priorities.

Or if football means more than children not being raped, now is a good time for mass suicide. We, as a society, don't need that. You're dirtying our collective gene pool. Go ahead and select a stake. Your only chance of not being a drain on the world is as a precaution to pedophiles everywhere. Ill even donate enough balls for you to play catch from up there. Well... until you die.

Oh and the rapist, the guy that saw the rapist do it and walked away, and everyone that knew and did the least they could?  Flayed alive then impaled.

Things I Will Never Do Again

Candy corn. That shit is beyond vile. But they keep making it.  And every three years lr so, I taste it again.

French or American manicure. I like them on other people, just not on me.

Any halloween costume involving a hat or mask.  Or fake fur. Or anything hot. Florida is hot.

Remember Michael Jackson fondly. Its not the junkie thing. Its listening to the story on Jimmy Kimmel about him terrorizing and assaulting homeless people in the middle of the night like its some cute endearing anecdote. Its awful. Its also something only a terrible person would do. Fuck that scumbag.

Mental Notes

1.  Wow do I hate an American manicure.  Talk about vanilla.  Bleh.

2.  Finally getting well enough from the plague to feel better so you can get some after weeks of the flu ROCKS!

3.  The things that man can do are almost frightening.

4.  If you cum long enough and hard enough that it makes your toes curl long enough you get foot cramps and charlie horses.

5.  Foot cramps and charlie horses are so worth it.

6.  I often forget how far from vanilla I have gone until I see other people talk about their sex life.

7.  This is why I don't really talk about my sex life in great detail.  I am the kind of kinky that seems to make people nervous.

8.  People consider things I just take for granted "edge play".

9.  I fell off the edge years ago.

Toe Curling

He knows me so well he can make me quiver in seconds.  He makes me cum so hard for so long that I ended up with foot cramps and woke up with a Charley horse at 4:30 in the morning.

Ya know what... totally worth it.

We have been together for years.  Normally we should be hitting the 7 year itch.  Ummmm no... he's the only man who has ever been able to do this, why they hell would I slum it?

Cause.... DAMN!

Is this really news?

So the Maddoff's were going to commit suicide.

And?

Listening to his wife talk about how they contemplated suicide because what was happening was so horrendous.  Not that what he DID was horrendous.  Not the way that he completely destroyed people's lives was horrendous.  Getting hate mail was the horrendous thing?


I get the sense this is more a manipulative attempt to elicit sympathy.  So let me just say...

Fuck Bernie Maddoff and fuck his whore.

In the meantime...

Dear Barbara Walters,

I think its time for an intervention.  The time has come to slow down the plastic surgery.  You look like you're wearing a Barbara Walters Halloween mask.  You're scaring the children now, Barbara.  Step away from the scalpel.  Let the swelling go down a little.  Wrinkles look better than that freaky swollen thing you have going on there.  Its not making you look younger anymore... it makes you look like the puppet from Saw.  Only... more creepy.

Don't believe me?

Switched at birth, right?

There is a thing as TOO much plastic surgery.  Barbara Walters has a long standing well respected career.  Why distract from that by warping what SHOULD be age with grace?

Unless you are going for a really great Halloween costume in which case, kudos for taking it to 11.

Change Nothing And Lose Weight

I see this question all the time in public weight loss forums.  "I don't like to exercise or diet - how do I lose weight?" 

You don't.

If what you are doing (not exercising and eating poorly) made you fat, why would you think continuing to not exercise and eat poorly would suddenly, magically make you thin? 

It won't.

Unfortunately, this "I want results without change and without effort" might be why many view fat people as just lazy. Frankly, wanting something (weight loss) for nothing (no changes, keep laying around eating junk) IS lazy.

Its also ineffective.

Not the Kind of Puppy Play I Enjoy...

The one where I am sick as a dog.  Halloween approaches and I have the plague.

We don't get a lot of days here in the tropics where it is nice to run outdoors.  I am usually consigned to the treadmill to avoid the humidity of doom.  This week I haven't been able to breathe, let alone run.

And have been sent to bed by 9:00.

So a world of suck.  My saving grace being the back and forth Spotify playlists with my best friend.  If I can't do anything fun, at least I can listen to something fun.

Happy Spirit Day!

I'm rocking the purple, of course.

Wild

I woke this morning to a story about lions and tigers and bears, oh my, escaped from the home of a dead gun runner.  I love it when I can't tell if the TV is on the news or an action flick when I open my eyes.

Rain, Rain, Go Away

At some point we turned into Seattle.  Its rained all day for days.

And people have lost the ability to drive, en mass.

Dear Left Thigh:

I get it. You're mad about the whole squat lunges thing. You can stop cramping now. Duly noted. Ill make it up to you. If I'm lucky, wrapping you around Master. If not, I will settle for the hot tub. 

<3 - me

Happy Coming Out Day, Fred Phelps!

If anyone could use a night in a bath house finally admitting he <3s cock, its that guy. Now that the shock value of the silly protests has become passe and people aren't really paying any attention anymore, its just a matter of time before he is "caught" with a rent boy.

No, the most dangerous threat to our country is not the "gay agenda" (some sinister plot to exercise the same rights straight people have) , its fucktards who distract from real threats by crying about the gay boogie man.

I really hope some horrible deadly painful plague, carried on the recessive homophobic fucktard gene, kills these people. All of them. I hope they die. I hope it hurts.

And I hope its broadcast on Logo.

Vantage

I have mentioned before that most of the time, the people I deal with on a daily basis are of a higher than average intelligence. So social media allows me a glimpse into the world beneath.

I was also raised to the belief with a strong work ethic. As a result, I have been comfortable for most of my life.  Again, social media allows a glimpse into a world I'm outside of. The men in my life have experienced hungry nights. Because of the mettle of the men they are, they did not wallow, but worked to make it so that I never have.

I am grateful for them.

More so when I catch a glimpse of the world that those who aren't surrounded by alpha men live in. 

Admittedly, I don't have respect for beta males that mistake themselves for alphas. I can spot them a mile away, and seem to instinctively go for the throat. But many mistake that distain for anger on my part. Nothing could be further from the truth. Nothing makes me more grateful for the men in my life than a glimpse at the alternative.

Worshipping at the Alter

Coffee. That is what will get me through today. Went to a concert last night. I'm a wuss when I miss bedtime. Gym will be fun.

National Coffee Day

Finally, a holiday I can get behind.

An Open Letter to the Nasty Cunt Using the 2nd Floor Bathroom

I don't know who you are and frankly, I don't care. But a) learn to flush and b) learn to WIPE YOUR NASTY ASS!  WTF?!?  This is the 2nd time today I've found the toilet in the first stall full of shit and no toilet paper.

I should spot you soon between the scratching and the horrible dirty ass stench.

Appocolypse

I live from app to app. FL app, blog app, FB app, Twitter, news feeds and of course cross platform chat.

I remember a time when I wasn't plugged in 24/7.  Not sentimental for it. I like this more.

A short workout to get me sweating, a cup of chocolate raspberry truffle coffee with splenda.  A good way to roll into Monday.


I am hoping that whatever the hell is going on with my body is on the way out.  Seems like a severe immune response.  I can't imagine what allergen is on the loose but it has hit every combo of defense response my body has.  At once.  So I have a flare up of my inconvenient little chronic pain problem AND the skin of a 14 year old in a hormone rush.  Feel like I'm 90, oily like I'm 14.  No fair!

One should never have to use wrinkle cream and acne medication at the same time.  Its just not fair.

For Fuck's Sake, Put Your Fucking Pants On!

When the fuck did people start to think it was perfectly acceptable to go to the store in fucking pajamas?  Is it really that hard to put on some pants?  I have had some spectacularly slobbish moments in my life... but for fuck's sake, put some fucking pants on.

If you are over the age of 6, you shouldn't be at the grocery store in your pajamas.  If you don't have the time or energy to dress yourself, I am guessing you didn't manage to run a brush over your teeth, or bathe, or even wipe your ass all the way.  And I don't want your skanky disease infested ass near my food.

If you can't manage to pull it together enough to clean and dress yourself, stay home you lazy slob.  

Fuck you... go home.  Stay home.  Take a shower!

Disclaimer

At this point it is starting to seem that the amount of time and thought people are putting into disclaimers that explain what an opinion is now exceeds the opinions being expressed.

What is the point of explaining that an opinion statement you make is your opinion?  Of course its your opinion.  There is an entire mechanism in place to reflect that the statements you are expressing are not your own opinion.  They are called quote marks.  Are there really so many people expressing other people's opinions that this point requires constant repetition?

Simply declaring something is "just your opinion" does NOT prevent other people from disagreeing with that opinion.  It isn't a magic word.  It doesn't mean your opinion isn't stupid.  There are a lot of stupid people with a lot of stupid opinions.

Now that is a disclaimer I would appreciate.  "You can probably skip reading this... I am an idiot."  That would be a real time saver.  I don't need to read what an opinion is 500 times a day.

If This Were A Movie

The satellite falling to Earth would stop the execution of that Georgia guy until they clear up whether he did anything.

Or it hits the CDC and releases the zombie virus. Really the whole zombie thing... its just a matter of when.

Or the falling satellite hits Japan's leaking nuclear plant and only... Brad Pitt and Lindsey Lohan can stop it. With Science!

Not the same science that causes that zombie thing. That would be bad.

You Know Who You Are

Our Spies Came Home

Hiking... in Iran. Mmmmhmmm. Or as most would call it... spies who got busted. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy our spies were returned alive and all. But they're not "hikers".  That's like calling someone who gets busted with a pot plant a "landscaper".

Israel and Palestine... ugh, re-runs. 

CNN is getting a little dry. Quick... some "C" list celebrity. Now is your time to get fucked up and grab that empty spotlight. Come on toppless Britney rant. Come on Charlie Sheen rampage.

D.A.D.T. is dead! lets skullfuck the corpse!

Yay!  The end of a stupid bigotted era.

What Happens When Dr. Who Gives You A Manucire

Re-"Victimization"

Dear Survivors;

Yeah, I know.  It can be annoying.  You spend years rebuilding yourself and then some online yahoo comes along and attempts to re-"victimize" you.  Someone who tells you that you don't have the brains or the skills to know whether you are or are not being abused now.  It can open all kinds of doors and create all kinds of self-doubt.  Take you right back to those early days of recovery where you doubt your own ability to make a choice or your own view of reality.  I get how angry it can make you when someone tells you that you aren't being abused and that it can be just as hurtful for some uninformed person to put you right back there and tell you that you are being abused.  I get that this sort of thing can cause years of setback in someone's recovery.

Take a deep breath, and say no.  Say no, I will NOT be a "victim" for you.

You can.  If you made it out alive, don't let someone else drag you back in.  You did all the hard work to get yourself away from abuse.  Don't let someone else drag you back there.  Don't let someone turn a survivor into a "victim" because they have an agenda.

Neo-Nazis Are Fucking Stupid

Yes, I know that's obvious.  But the one who tried to bomb the MLK parade last year was not only marching in the parade. With a camera. And he apparently paid for the bomb parts with a trackable payment method.

Why?

Because neo-nazis are fucking stupid.

So Master Came Home Covered In Blood Last Night...

He went to see "Song of the Living Dead". That play is very funny.  There is a "splash zone".

What I find funny is that I live somewhere where a guy can drive around covered in blood and there is zero reaction.

I have to flee to Party City now, but if you have Spotify give "I'm Fucking Awesome" or "Why Are You Cornholing Me Jesus" a listen for a laugh but its not work safe.

Overdrive

The laundry is running.
The dishwasher is running.
There is cod and brussels sprouts roasting in the oven.
The risotto finished a few minutes ago.
And I was knitting a scarf.

I may have gone into domestic overdrive this evening.

Time to Shave the Vacuum

I have hip length hair.  Master has waist length hair.

Sometimes, the vacuum cleaner needs a hair cut.

Een goede dag verder!

Brains!!!!!!

So Master is sending me to the theater with our friend Hawkke on Friday to see a zombie musical. I can't wait.  He's fun to hang out with and the play sounds hilarious.

Why A Slave Speaking in 3rd Person Is Almost Always The Sign Of A Clueless Master/Trainer

A slave's use of third person speech says a lot. The thing it says most clearly is that whoever is teaching them has no real clue what they are doing. (It also usually says whoever is training them garnered their slave training methods from poorly written fiction.) Many will tell you that "slave speak" will make a slave more conscious of their place. This shows a gross misunderstanding of what illeism is and does. (If you are going to argue against my point but had to look that word up, you just made my point.)

Psychologically speaking, illeism is an indication of narcissism. Forcing a slave to be an illeist increases narcissism. A curious training choice indeed.

Unless you read it in a fiction novel and never bothered to research it further.

It does work. Perhaps not in the way intended. In practice it is notable that third person slaves are quite impressed with themselves and their "depth" of slavery. You can't blame the slave. Their narcissism has been deliberately magnified through the ignorance of the person training them.

When posting this elsewhere, someone responded to say that narcissism is good because it synonymous with pride.  Also, they used this training method without ever having heard the term illeist.  In other words... yes, as stated - they proved my point.  They a) had no done no actual research prior to engaging in behavior modification and b) have no idea of the difference between narcissism and pride.  Also, there was a whole clutch the pearls gasping "you might be judging people and you can't do that" theme. 

Which goes to show... if you ever point out people doing something stupid, they will accommodate you by providing a living example.  

Goddless

I was recently reading a post by a slave who was not religious complaining that her religious Master forced her to pray. As an atheist, I can't wrap my mind around the idea of having a theist Master. I can't surrender complete control to someone who believes in the supernatural. I can't put my fate in the hands of an adult who relies on an invisable friend. It would always be there in my head - he has an imaginary friend and thinks they're in charge. Its a matter of judgment.

But very telling to me is how many religious people responded offended that she wasn't faking it, because that's what you're expected to do at reigious services. When I attended mass as a child, I always suspected it was predicated on a common understanding that we were collectively faking it. That suspicion is now confirmed. I just do not understand why. If you know its bull, why do it?

Off and Running

Off?  I went too far off my diet for too long and gained some weight as a result.  So he has me back on a stricter calorie restriction (including clearing things through him first and accounting for every calorie) and increased my gym trips (which really fell off).  I have a daily 1,000 calorie deficit to meet. 

And running again.  On the treadmill now.  Its too hot this time of year and I am very sensitive to the heat.  Even if I wait for twilight, I run the risk of overheating in the summer.  As much as I prefer the asphalt, I admit the air conditioning has its draw.  It also means I can hop in the pool when I am done to cool down.

Hitting the gym 5 - 6 days a week also means a bit more advanced menu planning.  Which is fine, because the shift in my calorie deficit means more menu planning anyway.  (I need to feed me little enough to hit my gap, and my kids enough to keep them growing and healthy.)

Its easier this time around... knowing I can do it because I already have.  And having FAR less ground to cover than the first time.  

Really, its just a matter of practice.

Wha...?

If I had a dollar for every knuckle dragging male supremacist or Gorean with half my IQ, half my income and 3 times my BMI that told me being female made me his "inferior"...

Look, if I can out think, out earn and out run/out last and generally kick the crap out of you, the whole "natural order" means your are inferior to me here in the 21st century U.S. 

And no... if you are one of those inferior men and you think the mere existance of men that aren't inferior somehow carries over and counts for you too that isn't the "natural order" you're promoting... its Marxism. If you're taking from the ability of others to meet your need, you're not Gorean, YOU'RE A MARXIST.  

I'm not saying I'm "better" by the way. I don't believe in gender supremacy. Mostly because, as you can see, its ridiculous. I'm applying the societal standards I can think of just off the top of my head. Far too often the "natural order" is wielded like a club by those who would rank as "inferior" if it were the standard applied because, ironically, they're too stupid to understand how it actually works.

Playing Doctor

There are things I will get on the internet. Medical advice isn't one of them. I am ceaselessly amazed by people tossing caution to the wind and following whatever is trending on twitter.

I have doctors I like. I tend to run stuff by them.  I ask questions. I read. Then I ask more questions. Web MD is a start for questions to ask my doctor.

For some reason, this approach confuses many people. I'm not one to read something online and decide I have it. Or worse... start doing/taking things. I want to know if an herbal supplement will interact with my birth control. I want to know if gluten free will mess up my hormones. I want to ask the doctors that know me, my history and my preferences these things, rather than random strangers online and unvetted sources.

People research the things they do to themseves less than I researched my lip gloss. It amazes me.

Trueblood

They may as well actually buy a motorcycle and a shark tank.

Stepping away from the books was a mistake.  The books are enjoyable.

While I will admit the fact that the all 6 pack having all shirtless male cast trend going on this year is fun, the writing sucks more than the vampires this season.

Watching each week is starting to feel like a chore.

Mental Notes

1.  An antlion is the larval stage of a flying insect.

2.  Firefly was cancelled in the first season and Jersey Shore is in its 4th season, proving that the human race has outlived its usefulness.

3. Hulk Hogan is hosting a "midget wrestling" show?  Did I mention that whole human race outliving its usefulness thing?

4.  Richard O'Brien currently voices the father on Phineas and Ferb on Disney.

5.  This sentence in response to one of my posts "I am much more smarter then that." wins today's irony award. 

6.  I escaped the DMV successfully.

I Don't Need Limits, I Have Standards

The seemingly endless debate. People seem to have a strange need to tell others "You have limits!  If your Master were to (insert insane and grossly improbable scenario involving a chainsaw here) you would say no.

I never sat down and reviewed a list of "limits" like that with my owner. My standards are high enough that I would never pursue a collar from a man I thought might be a serial killer. If you're stupid enough to surrender yourself to the Texas Chainsaw Massacre guy, I'm all for you getting your head cutoff because it really isn't doing you any good. Limits don't stop maniacs. If your entire safety contingency plan consists of a set of useless magic words, you're an idiot and again, I'm all for you getting beheaded. The world needs less morons, we are all better off without you.

This "you have to have limits because I do" practice of tossing out outrageous examples is a distraction used to cover their own mundane "limits".  No haircuts, no poly, no anal, blah blah blah. The ones that sound petty to those who don't share them.

I do not need to create an arbitrary list just to assauge someone else's feelings of inferiority. If you feel less"slavelike" just because I have turned over control of things you still keep from your own Master - that's your problem. I'm not playing the "you wouldnt ..." game. Yes. I would.

Am I worried?  Nope.

Standards.

I picked a good man and gave myself to him. It works much better than picking a man who would be a complete shit unless I told him he isn't allowed to be.

The fact that my owner doesn't hack bits off me before sending me to rob a bank has zero to do with me. Its because he is a good man all on his own.

I don't need to raise a Master, thanks. 

Murder in Aruba

I'm not blonde or anything, but still I am thinking Aruba may be coming off the list of possible vacation spots I submit to Master.

I can't really comment on the case.  I haven't seen much about it.

But... WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT SUSPECTS TOUPEE?  It looks like indoor/outdoor carpeting stapled to his head.  And of course, the shot they show over and over on the news is the guy walking down the street adjusting his dead squirrel... ummm hair piece?

They often refer to toupees as "hair appliances".  That guy would look better if he just stapled a toaster to his head.

Bad rugs will never cease to amaze me.  How do you look at yourself in the mirror with a welcome mat stapled to your head and think its a good look?  How?!

And living in South Florida, land of the old, you see them a lot.  Men that are so old that they are seemingly unaware that their piece from 15 years ago no longer fits.  So sometimes you catch site of someone with an inch of white wirey hair, an inch of bare skin, and a smooth jet black rug.

I should start taking pictures. Like bird watchers. Keep a "awful rug" journal.  Launch a "People of Bad Toupees" website.

Nah...  too lazy.

I Hate the DMV

I made an appointment at the DMV because I am changing my name to Master's.  Yes, I know I got married a month and a half ago.  That's how speedy these folks are.  After going through two different check-in people who looked at my paperwork, I sat in the stinky overflowing hot lobby for several hours before being called into a second line.  Where I waited for another hour, because of the 11 stations, 2 were open and they were averaging 1 customer every 20 minutes.  It wasn't until I was most of the way through my name change process they informed me that they couldn't do it and I would have to come back because I had to do it with Social Security and wait 24 hours after.

After 2 people went through my papers when I got there.

In large part, people hate the DMV because they are lazy and bad at their job.  It would have helped if anywhere on the DMV website that I read through before I went there (hey, why not, I had 6 weeks!) it had mentioned you had to do your SS first.  SS only took me half an hour without an appointment.  I could have done that on my lunch hour a week ago.

I suspect their understaffing was due, in large part, to Florida's dumbass lump of governor's drug testing scam.  By some coincidence, the governor who decided to drug test all the State employees just also happens to own drug testing companies.

And the citizens get to pay for and suffer from his blind selfish greed.

Thanks, Governor Scott.  Next election season, I will remember my wasted day at the DMV. And I will warn/remind every voter I can,

Complete

As I was making the morning commute to the sounds of app games and children's songs and babble it occurred to me how empty I would be without them. I adore Master, but a collar can't fulfill the need for motherhood.

I am happy with our life.

It is complete.

Ok, Seriously, WTF Is Wrong With These Parents?

Why are children in the U.S. dying for a fucking game?  Did you people miss ALL the reports about people dropping like flies in this heat wave?  Why aren't we arresting eveyone involved for child endangerment and, where applicable, manslaughter?  For football?  You would let your child die for a GAME?  Wow.

I would be ok with marching every single one of these useless bag of shit moron assholes into the school gym and shooting them through the head in front of the other parents.

Oh, and for those that think my disagreeing with them or even thinking they are morons - this is me angry. Dead kids make me angry. THIS kind of stupid, the kid killing sort, does make me angry. Stupid people who don't directly effect me or kill anyone do not make angry.  That is derision. (Stupid people can never understand the difference. Cause they're stupid, duh!)

But criminally kid killing stupid for a game - that's genuine anger.

Slave Car vs Slave Bus

I often see owning a slave compared to owning a car. An apt analogy for one-on-one M/s relationships.  Does that means slaves who are required to refer to everyone is a public bus?

Crossroads

So here I sit at the crossroads.

Literally. Master sent me out to fetch something.

And there is someone selling roses (to which I'm very allergic) and a guy with a "Repent & believe in Jesus" sign.

If I had to let one or the other in the car, I think I  would opt for wheezing and hives.

Brand New Addiction

I may as well graft my phone onto my body at this point. A 4g droid with unlimited data.

I'm posting from my blogger app.

And now I have Spotify Premium.

Or as I call it - crack.

A song pops into my head and a few keystrokes later I'm listening to it. I love the age we live in.

I'm having a geekgasm.

Not The Kinda Blown I Was Hoping For...

So Happy Birthday Master!  Ya remember when you said something about getting blown?

How does our house getting hit by a tornado sound?

We are all safe and ok.  Some minor damage, some clean-up, I have to deal with my homeowner's insurance now.  (Ugh.)

Some of the surrounding neighborhoods took heavy damage.  It could be much worse.

Dear Grocery Store Employees:

I'm not sure if you're familiar with these little wires hanging out of my ears, but they're called headphones. The fact that I have them in, coupled with the fact that I'm looking at my phone and totally ignoring you is actually not an invitation to follow me flailing at me until I pause what I'm doing to remove my headphones just so I can assure you that I don't need your assistance. Perhaps if you and the other 8 coworkers who went out of their way to repeatedly disrupt me concentrated on actually finishing stocking the shelves you were assigned, I would have been able to walk out with what I came in for, rather than empty handed. Which at least made it easier to rewind what I was trying to listen to.

Thanks.

Master Baker

Or "How Master Got Me Lynched By A Mob Of Angry Women"...

We have periodic fundraisers for a children's charity at my office.  More often than not, these involve bake sales and pot luck luncheons.  Master likes kids.  He likes helping sick kids.  He likes baking.

So when these food centric fundraisers roll around, Master breaks out the baking dishes...

and I get "the look".

The "let me get this straight... your husband made this triple chocolate cake?  The guy that sends flowers for no given reason?"

Yeah... someone's husband's gonna get bitched at.  Again.

Just... not mine.

Maintaining the Painted Whore

I know...I don't talk about the whole I'm enslaved thing. Its not that I shy from it. Rather, its not really relevant to anyone but he and I.  Sometimes someone asks me a question that does open the topic that isn't about me explaining, again, why it my place with him doesn't apply to them. Yay! 

Q:  So what alterations has being in a collar had that aren't a result of specified training.

A:  A considerable increase in the femininity in subtle ways.

My hair is longer than I might have gone with. Its also dyed.  I keep slapping a fresh coat on the roots because he likes it dark. I use a multistep skin treatment to soften and clear my skin. I wear my makeup in the ways he compliments it rather than how I used to. I wear less lipstick because it makes a mess. I have manicures and pedicures and wax all sorts of things (including balls of hot wax on a stick shoved up my nose to rip the unsightly nose hair out). Tattoos, hundreds of handmade collars, skirts and heels, makeup and nailpolish.

Left to my own devices, I would probably be more bull dyke than princess, makeup off, nails chewed to the quick, ever after in a pair of size 26 sweat pants.

I am more attentive because of him. And my place.  I am also much happier for it.

Happy Hump Day

Yeah, I know, its not Wednesday. I'm a newlywed.

People Need to Learn the Difference Between a Personal Agenda and a Fact

Dear Guys Who Bitch That Women Get Everything In A Divorce;

They don't.  Ask a lawyer.  A good one.  Then shut your fucking yap for three seconds and actually LISTEN when they answer.  If you have kids, you have to support them.  Fuck you, quit whining that the court will make you act like a fucking grown up if you fail to do so.  If you create a life with someone where they are dependent on you long enough that they are unable to support themselves, you will be expected to continue to live the life you created.  Fuck you, quit whinging.  Fair warning - the next moron who says "I heard..." and repeats some brilliant 'advice' they got from a sitcom, or the internet, or their idiot buddy who made a bad deal will be clubbed to death like a baby seal.

Dear Ladies Who Think They Get A Free Ride With Their Wedding Band:

Fuck you.  You don't.  Get a job, get a skill, get a fucking clue.  It isn't 1952 anymore.  You are not the 'weaker sex' in the work force.  You are not "entitled" to shit.  That includes alimony.  If you are married for 3 years, don't expect to get a shitload of money for the rest of your life.  Expect to get a job.  And expect me to tell you to shut the fuck up if you bitch that you actually have to support yourself and your kids.  Your kids aren't bargaining chips to wrench a few extra bucks from the poor bastard that finally pried himself out of your harpy claws.  Don't expect the rest of the world to be willing to tolerate your "I'm just a girl!" bullshit because you don't feel like working just as hard.  You aren't getting the baby seal club... you're getting yolked to some farm equipment and put to real use.

Dear People That Actually Stepped Up and Acted Like a Grownup in a Divorce:

Thank you.  Now when either of the two types above bitch and moan - say something.  Call them on it so the untrue sterotypes stop being the vocal myth.

Or get a seal club or an ox yoke.

Either works for me.

Signed,
Sick of Your Shit Being my Problem

Strange Things Make Me Feel Better

I had a rough morning, but some days it only takes a cute slavey toe ring to make it all better. I'm embracing my girlie side.

Ice, Ice Baby

Our new hookah arrived yesterday.  A 21 inch pyramid based Namoor with ice tips.  Master and I live in South Florida, and the cold water/ice we use to cool the smoke doesn't last too long outside. (We have kids, no smoking inside). 

The tips are huge. Around 13 inches long. They bear a spooky resemblence to some of our toys. Hmmm....

Anyway... they do more than cool the smoke. Its cold. Like walk in freezer cold.

They do break down the aromatics, so there is little flavor from the shisha.

But it is quite different. Refreshing in a Florida summer.  We have a few shishas where the flavor is somewhat bland. Seems a good use for those.

Can we piss on his corpse?

So they are digging up Rudolph Hess, obliterating his grave, destroying and disbursing his remains at sea to discourage neo-nazi pilgrims from paying homage at his grave.

Good start. Id prefer the remains being used in urinal cakes, but I'm guessing its late to launch a letter writing campaign on that.

Life in the sunshine state.

Wheeze

I opened my eyes, rolled over... and coughed.  Day 5 of this cold/flu/general suck.

Sigh.

I am making wheat pasta and turkey meatballs in mushroom sauce tonight even if my lung falls out on the counter, damnit!  I'm tired of being a useless lump of fevered flesh.

On the upside... the new coffee meant I didn't need to scrub anything or empty or fill anything to make Master's coffee this morning.  I set up the timer to heat the water, so all needed to do was select which flavor he felt like, pop it in and 30 seconds later - coffee.

Coffee, Coffee, Coffee

You know it's love when he brings home vanilla biscotti coffee. 

You know he's perfect when he brings home a princesses dress to distract the little one from sick mom.

The Only Tiny Me

I'm above average height for a female. I grew up roughhousing with the boys of my family (big boys), in the pit at local hardcore shows with skinheads and punks, and wandering dark corners of Miami.  I don't intimidate easily. (Some might say at all.) 

Yet somehow Master can make me feel tiny and feminine.  Not weak, either, which is a fine line to walk. I will back down from him in a way I see no reason to with others. I don't know if its the love, the trust, why it is that he causes a reaction noone else does.  Many have tried, and I've laughed in their face. One of my old SHARP friends remembers me as the only person to get in his face, other than his own mother.

He has tamed the Amazon. But only when it comes to him. 

New

Its been a busy week. The thing that finally slowed things down is my getting sick.  So I'm curled up on the couch, watching Star Trek Next Gen with Master and sneezing.

How sexy is Picard when he gets all authoratative?

And loving my new 4g droid phone. Master has turned me into a total geek.

Our new hookah is on the way. One that works with the ice tip hoses. I can't wait to try them. Hopefully I can breathe again by the time it arrives.

Master's new humidor is also on the way. There is so much to learn about cigars. Between that and poker I have a lot of catch-up.

Mental Notes

1.  The bad Monday morning back after a week off is put into stark perspective when your best man totals his car on the way into the office.  Ok E, you win, your day sucked WAY more.

2.  Changing your name really confuses people.

3.  The more I read of my single friend's experiences, the happier I am that Master is in my life.

4.  I love my happy life.

5.  No one has ever broken up with me.  I have never been left, no matter how bad things have gone. I always had to walk away.  Because I was often needed more than I was loved.

6.  It is far better to be loved than needed.

7.  Being both totally rocks.

New Steel Circle and Unexpected Wedding Guests

Master and I headed out to Vegas to make it legal this week.  It turns out there are certain federal widow benefits I would not be eligible for if he died without us being legally married.  (Ironically, research on gay marriage ended up in my own marriage.)  There are many things you can do with other forms of paperwork, but there are certain benefits which are just not available without a legally recognized marriage.

Which, by the way, makes me want to fight just that much harder for marriage equality.

One thing neither of us thought to mention to the Elvis chapel in which we took our vows...

We are both atheists.

So God made an unexpected (at least by us) appearance at our wedding.  They don't do changes to the vows.  So we didn't really find this out until we were there.

Which is fine by me.  We didn't have to make any God related promises.  Just bible quotes and stuff.  Pretty ones about love.

I am not an anti-theist, and the God mentions were really more an expression of the officiants beliefs than ours.

We had a lot of fun.  We also had a hot tub honeymoon suite on the top floor of the Luxor, which we got pretty much comped along with a nice breakfast in bed.

I have learned that if you get on an airplane wearing bride and groom Mickey Mouse ears, you get a lot of free drinks and snacks.  And a lot of smiles.  People love babies and honeymooners... and honeymooners don't cry the whole plane ride.

It's M/s, Not Quantum Physics

Maybe I just can't remember what it was like starting out anymore, but I don't recall being a slave as being a huge challenge or particularly traumatic.  It took a lot of adjustment, but overall I was happy with my place.  Its why I have stayed there this long.  I'm not high maintenance, and he isn't a micromanager.  We make a good pair in that.

I can see the appeal of high maintenance/micromanagement for people who need or want that.  But combining people on opposite ends of the spectrum seems to end badly rather consistently.  You either get slaves complaining of being neglected, or strangled, and Masters complaining of being overburdened or underobeyed.

It seems like the sort of thing you should really know about yourself BEFORE you decide to even start with someone?  Then again, a lot of people seem to have rose colored glasses.

I have known Master almost 20 years.  So how is it that, in all that time, I never knew he had never seen "A Fish Called Wanda"?  Good thing I own the DVD.  Jamie Lee Curtis is insanely hot.

Pretty Shiny Purple Nail Polish. Manicures, Pedicures, Waxing, High Heels, Dresses, Hair Past My Ass.  One thing that has shifted in me in our years together... I am much girlier than I was before I was collared.  I don't have to constantly tough, I get to be soft.

Well That Sucked

A day and night worried about our youngest being sick.  High fevers are frightening.  Just old enough to say everything hurts and scare the crap out of us, but not old enough to be too specific so we can narrow it down.  Seems to have started coming down around 5:00 am, though, so Master can get some sleep while I man the fort.

Its not the best way to start the holiday weekend.  Normally, "Independence" Day involves much bondage.  I get the sense that this year it will involve little sleep and lots of comforting.

Oh well, he knows where to find me when things come back down to earth.  I'm here for life, so we have as long as we have in the world together.  That's the best bondage of all.

"That's the One Place You Want Em To Have Hair"

A few more inches and my hair will be longer than some of my skirts.  Kinda funny.

Meanwhile, because I need to grow it out to get a brazillian wax, I currently have pubic hair. Well, some anyway. And I HATE it.  I feel like I'm wearing a toupee on my crotch.  It pulls, it blocks sensation.  Master thinks it's kinky.  I'm not usually hairy, so I see his point.  But since being collared and required to keep bare, my interstitial cystitis flares up less.  So I'll be happy top be without again.

Judicial Thugs

WTF is going on in Wisconsin!?!  Since when do judges try to strangle other judges?  Prosser is what happens when someone gets elected by magically appearing votes. Ya get a judge who beats up women. 

Isn't batshit crazy behavior a Florida trademark? 

I have been screamed at, cried at, threatened... And this is just as support staff.  It doesn't even phase me, let alone unhinge me to the point of physical attack the opposing party.  And I start off with a penchant for blinding violence.

So how completely off the rails is ttet W.I. Judge?

I'm very happy marriage equality passed in NY.  My soon to be legal spouse is male, but I'm for all equality.  What's less American than saying one group doesn't have the same right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness?  When did w fail in that so deeply?

Them again... Failing in compassion, thats more American?

Travel with a Human Pet

My bff was kind enough to link me an article on how to travel with things like lube and handcuffs and sex toys.  Air travel for the kinky has become more complicated in our modern era.  Metal detectors require the removal of certain types of collars and jewelry, or the inclusion of additional time to get through security.  One must limit their packing, or anticipate additional time in security explaining
'that isn't a bomb, its the motor for my vibrator'.  You aren't going to waltz through security with someone on a leash and easily hop on your plane.

The TSA is not known for its sense of humor. Honestly, it shouldn't be.  I know there is that whole its a free country thing.  But if you go out of your way to do the sort of "pay attention to me" thing, like leashing a slave in public, you have drawn attention to yourself.  "Attention" in the airport means additional security scrutiny.  That is the reality of the world we live in.  Out of the norm behavior of any sort ups the security profile. 

Given the Biker and Elvira look we have going, we get enough attention as it is.

Fortunately, I make my own jewelry, and this includes a rather expansive collection of collars.  Including ones with no metal pieces whatsoever.  Woven glass beads and button closures don't set off metal detectors.  The only interest they draw from security personnel is usually from the female ones asking 'where did you get that?' 

My clit is already crazy sensitive, so we don't use vibrators.  (They wouldn't even work for torture, they tend to make me queasy, so the only useful application is if he wants me to vomit.  And its easier just to turn on Fox News to make that happen.)  So I don't have to worry about disassembling a vibrator motor.  I can see where one would want to buy a cheap one at their destination rather than risk an expensive one being removed from their luggage.



I'm pretty sure the airline won't let me fly in a cage in the storage hold.  More's the pity.

Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to my big bundle of sexy bad ass dadness.

Slave Hobbies

I have new hobbies.  So does Master.  He has developed an interest in the hookah.  We now have a regular ritual of putting the kids to bed, then heading outside to spend some time alone together talking over the hookah.  Its a great time for communication and for us to bond in a grown up M/s manner, rather than in our parental roles.

It also means I have learned to clean and set up a hookah.  I wash the parts - usually in the morning before I leave for work so the water can cool in the vase in the fridge all day.  When we are ready, I will ask him what he has a "taste" for that day.  Sometimes he cares, sometimes he doesn't and I pick from the ones I know he likes.  Sometimes we try something new.  Sometimes he takes care of the clean up or set up, but I find I enjoy it.  A small, insignificant service, but I enjoy those most of all sometimes.

When he decided he wanted to do something in the kitchen, I rearranged the kitchen to be sure he had all the space I could manage to wring out of that small kitchen to work in.

Its the little things, the small daily moments, that maintain my head space more than the grand gestures.

New Hobbies

I have started a few new hobbies.  Last year, I ordered a Cricut on black friday for my scrapbooking.  They ended up sending me a Cricut Cake by accident.  I paid for both, and kept both.  I just took the Cake out of the box this weekend so I can learn to use it before the next big bake (fundraiser for Make A Wish).  I am trying to learn to work with gumpaste and food color.  This is not an easy task in the Florida summer.  But the machine makes it ridiculously easy to use.  My co-workers are about to eat a lot of cake.  Master isn't going to let me eat a dozen cakes a month, so my goal is just to make them look pretty.

Then there is knitting.  Another hobby rendered completely impractical when you live in South Florida.  I have endeavored to pick up the ability nevertheless.  I can see where some practice would make one very fast at producing items.  I am far from that point yet.  So far, the wrap I am making looks... well... hideous.  But I struggled with all my other hobbies at first, too.  The first beaded loom stuff I did was ugly and took forever.  Now I can pump out a collar a day if I really focus.

My owner is very supportive of my little girlie past times.  As long as they don't get in the way of my chores, why not?  He is amused by my collection of collars, a new one for every outfit and every occasion.  But it is getting to the point where I may pack up my desktop (which I rarely use) and turn that corner into a craft area.  I have gone beyond a small cabinet at this point. 

Believe it or not...

This is not for anything Christmas related.

Hot Wax and Weiner

On someones recommendation, I tried european waxing (no linen) last week. OMG!!! Anyone who has a problem with waxing should definitely try the European Waxing Center.  Normally I leave the salon looking like a clown with huge red eyebrows and a red goatee.  The wax burns my skin.  This stuff didn't.

So I booked a Brazillian for the wedding.  A strange woman pours hot wax on my genitals, then she hurts me.  For $60.00? How did I not do this before?!?! 

So... Anthony Weiner sends cock shots and had cybersex and it takes over the news weeks?  Seriously?  CNN had turned into the Cockshot News Network. Lets hope noone ever tells CNN about Chat Roulette.  They'll have a 24/7 scroll on split screen.

Hard Times and the Side Effects of Glittery Habits

I have a hard time communicating sometimes.  I was raised in a very private and internalized environment.  "Appropriate" was very important.  So while I am extremely (some say excessively) honest about what I think of some things, I still tend to guard certain things.  I work on it constantly, and sometimes it is very hard work. Its those things, those hard things, and working through them that really define my M/s relationship for me.  I drag these things out of myself, against my nature, and give them to him.  No matter how long it takes, or hard it is, I keep trying.

Its not handcuffs and spankings.  That I could, in theory, do with anyone.

Talk about myself?  Admit things I don't necessarily want someone else to be aware of?  That is where the control lies.

I finally got around to finishing that bina flower collar I started forever ago (I had a few things in between.)  And once I was finally finished... I don't like it. I don't like the color contrast, I did the closure in a stupid way.

So now I am working on a posey collar.  Like a posey ring... only in beaded collar form.  This one will read "I am my beloved's".   It's from the bible... "I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine."

I am using the bit that actually applies.


If I like how this turns out, I may need to start looking for other short sayings that work.  Hell, given the overrunning buckets of collars laying around the house at this point, I may start to sell them.  I love making them, but one can only wear so many.  And making things to order would allow me to work in colors that don't necessarily look good on me.  Jewel tones work best on me.  But there are so many pretty light or subtle tones out there.

Sold for Parts

I have long hair.  What most people would call really long hair.  I was walking past a beauty supply store over the weekend and the man working at the store (I presume the owner) asked me if I wanted to sell my hair. 

As of now, I am not being sold off for parts. 

See... I wouldn't want to cut my hair.  I am fortunate that he doesn't want to, either, because its not up to me. I have very, very long hair because my owner prefers it very, very long.  And because I am fortunate enough to have a very long growth cycle. 


Who knows if I will still be that lucky tomorrow.

This morning, there was a story on the news about people breaking into beauty supply stores to steal the supplies of very expensive human hair used in weaves.  Small world.

Sad Day

My best friend moved today.   Her husband was stationed in another state.  Which sucks.  Such is the life of a military wife.  But in a state I have family in, and he said we can go there too visit. 

Military wife. I am the person I least expected to end up married, but she would be second in that list. Let alone to be a military wife.  She promised to let me know if she goes to disney so she can book me a room at the shades of green hotel.  (military family and guests only)

I will miss her, but her husband has been gone a long time and I'm happy they will be reunited in a few days.

What happens when I follow bread crumbs...

So following a post made by someone who's thoughts I actually enjoy reading, I came upon this hot, steamy pile posted by someone else..

"You are walking by...You encounter a slave be it. kajira or kajirus. In some way the slave has did something to offend you. Genuinely, enough that it deserves punishment. The slave is not yours. It belongs to someone."

Go ahead... give yourself a moment to let those pearls of wisdom sink in a bit.

This poster than goes on to posit whether one should take it upon to correct another person's slave right then and there, bring it to the owner's attention, or move along when said slave "has did something to offend you".

I think his time would be better spent worrying less about the discipline of other people's slaves, and more about the fact that he can't form a coherent sentence.


Just trying to navigate the nightmarish collection of sentence structure problems and grammar fails in that first paragraph made me realize I would have to eat an elementary school worth of lead paint chips before I could drop my IQ far enough to relate to this person.  Let's call him Skippy, for the sake of anonymity. 

I don't view Skippy as properly qualified to dole out graham crackers to a kindergarten class, let alone discipline to another person's property. Seriously, if someone can fuck up a simple phrase THAT badly, what would they do to another human being?

I actually had a really good laugh reading through parts of that thread. 

Mostly because of things like:

"Same regard, I've had barbarian girls with other free disciplined for disrespect. I'd also discipline them afterwords again myself."

Wow, am I happy I am not required to fake respect for morons.  I really don't see me keeping a straight face with some trumped up fuckhat looking to "discipline" me "afterwords".



Actually, I can see how having to read an afterwords by said poster without interjecting to explain the difference between afterwords and afterwards would be physically painful.  Though really, I think the only lesson it would teach me is that I have zero tolerance for genuinely stupid people with delusions of adequacy. I learned that one a LONG time ago.  Really, it would just be redundant.  And then I would have to spend all that time explaing what redundancy means, using the simplest words I can muster. 

 "An example: A slave is passing me.. As I am walking, she does not kneel does not acknowledge my existence, completely ignores me. Just keeps walking by.. I would find that offensive.." 

Does falling over with laughter count?  Cause then I am pretty sure I am safe.

Love in a Collar

I dont personally buy into the idea that M/s relationships are inherently superior, closer, or more committed.  My grandparents have been married 70 years, my parents for 40, and no M/s.  I've seem slaves go through 4 or 5 Masters in the 7 years I've spent in a collar.  I dont put a lot of stock in the label.  I dont believe love destroys M/s.  I also think it's possible without it.

My owner and I both come from unbroken homes.  Our respective former spouses both came from broken homes.  It makes me wonder if a life model of long term marriage makes it easier to do it yourself.  I'm the first divorced person in my family.  Not the last, but I was the first. 

This will be a second marriage for both of us. Time will tell if two people with the example of what it takes to work have a better chance.  It's already been longer than we were happy before.  We still are.

So far, so good.

BEWARE: Killer Slave

I am a slave. I am not an inherently submissive person. Not even close.  This puzzles a lot of people. It's extra funny with those who base their "dominance" on my playing along and acting "slavelike" to total strangers.  On the internet. 

It's a bit odd.  More than a bit, really.  I'm also a paralegal.  Attorneys from other offices don't expect me to run research for them.  I'm a mother. Strangers don't expect me to mother their kids.  I'm a best friend.  Strangers don't pop by to hang.  Just because I'm someone's wife, strangers dont ask me to do their laundry.

So why is it that a Master/slave relationship is the single personal relationship in which a large number of random internet strangers expect to participate and be treated as a part of said relationship? 

As to slaves being property... Since when do you get free reign over other peoples property?  Didn't we used to execute people for poaching or cattle rustling? 

So I dont really need one of those "don't use my info in a college study" disclaimer things. I need this....

Dear Random Master/Dom(me)/Daddy/Mommy/Top Types:

Congratulations on reaching a reading comprehension level to ascertain that I'm a slave. I am a chattel slave.  I am property.  That is true.  But as you have clearly obtained the reading skills to know that, you should know that I am Rivalkeeper's property.  Please be advised that any attempt to push any expectations of behaviors on me that do not come directly from him will be considered poaching and SLAVE RUSTLERS WILL BE SHOT ON SIGHT. 

BEWARE OF SLAVE.

Bastard!

I don't like being touched by strangers.  So, since Master is a sadistic bastard, I'm making a "Yes, you can touch my tits" shirt.  And yeah, he means it.  So if you're in Vegas this summer and see a chick who looks like a chubby Elvira in a black tank top that says that, ask the biker looking guy shes with if you want.

You'd think I'd be over blushing already.

Met up with my best friend for some lunch hour shoe shopping.  A girl nooner.  Got some very hot heels to go with my wedding gown. 

Mission Accomplished

I have my veil, dress and rings are on the way in the mail, the chapel is booked, vows are selected.

Oh, did something else happen recently?

Bound for good

So after all these years of common law living, we are getting legally hitched.  Although the original reasons were pragmatic, I find myself going all girlie.  Not bridezilla or anything. I wouldn't get away with that.  But happy.   Bouncy.  Master finds out amusing. 

The day to day won't change. But its one more way to put his name on me, and a kind of "his" that is internationally recognized.  In a world where slave has no meaning to others, wife is a concept anyone understands.

Now to find a chapel that will accommodate "obey" in my side of the vows. 

In Vegas.  With Elvis. 

If it was traditional, it wouldn't be us.  And we have both been married before. Too young to the wrong people.  One thing I've learned since then?  Its the marriage, not the wedding, that matters.

Plus, hes gonna let me wear a mickey mouse ears veil.  

Gorean Rapists

This really is turning into a "See, Goreans are idiots!" blog, huh?

So... John Joseph Hauff, Jr.  http://www.king5.com/news/local/Victims-of-Tacoma-torture-suspect-asked-to-come-forward-120320839.html He's Gorean.  At least, that's what he told the prostitute he kidnapped and tortured. http://www.king5.com/news/local/Victims-of-Tacoma-torture-suspect-asked-to-come-forward-120320839.html

This is precisely what I mean when I say telling inferior men that they are inherently superior is  BAD idea. Because the extra stupid useless ones buy into it a little too well.

And now, the "Gorean community" will close ranks and claim this guy isn't REALLY Gorean.

The problem is... by their own standards... he is.

The very same community that would be the first folks to step up and declare his right to do as he pleases within the circle of his own sword (or his creepy basement torture room, as the case may be) will now be backpeddling at the speed of light to distance themselves because he is an embarrassment. 

Welcome to my world, kids.  I just found it easier to dismiss the entire distorted community as a whole, then pretend that it wasn't made up primarily of dregs no different that this Hauff guy.  You were already an embarrassment.

Face it, Goreans, your rather lax "it claims to have a penis, lets tell it its in charge" approach has turned your "community" into a safe refuge for psychos, losers and total drooling idiots.

Gor is the crackhouse of BDSM communities now.  Deny it all ya like, your Hauff has come home to roost.

Monday, We Meet Again

Dear News Agencies:

Stop trying to surprise me. If I want suspense, I will watch a mystery.  Just give me the facts and stop trying to make a game out of it.

Republican Election Fraud

The Ed Schultz Show : News

Republican election fraud: not just for Presidents anymore.

1. Lose

2. Next day, have an election official from your party, who used to work for you, announce she made a "mistake" and "found" votes that give you the election.

I'm not normally a conspiracy person, but this sounds like a South Park plot.

Further Musings on the Inherent Failure of the Gorean Community

I do not mean to turn this into a "Gorean Fail Blog", however, it happens with such frequency that it is likely to pop up on occasion.

I was recently a party to a discussion regarding protocol and Gor on a BDSM website, in a discussion group that is NOT Gorean by nature.  The content of the converstaion was not sufficiently interesting to repost here.  Pretty standard.  However, it should be noted that, while Gorean protocol may have been the discussion topic, not being a Gorean forum Gorean protocol was not applicable.

Inevitably, it seems, the response of a male Gorean to my disagreement was to refer to me as "girl".

Now, as this is not a Gorean forum, the use of "girl" in reference to a woman you do not know implies a level of either intimacy or camaraderie which was clearly NOT appropriate under the circumstances - or is used as a pejorative.

This set off the "Oh, this person is an idiot" alarm.  I will explain.

It was clear that the person using the phrase intended it to be a pejorative.  It would be readily apparent to any person possessing the observational and analytical skills of someone with a average to slightly below average level of intelligence, from my combined previous statements, that I would not view my gender identification as a negative.  I am female.  I am also right handed.  And tall.  Oh, and of legal age ("girl" is technically inaccurate, I am female, or a woman, but not a female child.)  These are all readily observable, clearly stated facts even the simplest person can figure out quickly and easily.

For some reason, the simplest of people do seem to view the statement of readily observable facts (like a person being female) is somehow an insult.  I assume it is because those of sub-par intellect are simply intellectually incapable of better.   This is pitiable.

I am female.  Attempting to utilize that as an insult, against someone who is clearly not of the mentality that it is inherently inferior to be one gender or the other, is evident of a below average thinking process. An underlying inability to think creatively.

The Gorean dogma, the script, calls for use of the word "girl" as an insult.  Those of inferior intellect are incapable of thinking off script.  This is often most obvious when they are upset.  Anger follows a possible threat to the carefully sculpted reality, and anger clouds thought.

If you aren't particularly skilled at thought in the first place... this is the inevitable result. 



This leads me to the conclusion that it is more likely than not that the person making the statement lacked those elementary observational and analytical skills and was likely below average in intelligence.  (It did note that the woman he was endeavoring to "rescue" from me asking her a question seems to be of considerably higher intellect class than her guardian.  I find the surrendering of power to one's intellectual inferiors an interesting phenomenon, and may want to remember that as a concept to explore further in the future.) 

Now the core concepts of the natural slave start with Aristotle.  An undeniable genius.  The Gorean novels, written by Lange (a person one might assume to be of above average intelligence at the least), filter the core concepts of Aristotle into pulp fiction, consumed by the masses.

The Gorean lifestyle itself, serving as a safe haven for those of lower intellect to have a position of power (discussed in a previous post) now allows those of low intellect to filter that concept even further.  Now, however, the filter is grossly flawed.

It is impossible for the Gorean philosophy to survive that sort of inferior filter in tact.

Pro-Life Crazies Interfere with my Chicken

I have been injured by a patent  leather 5 inch heeled knee high boot. And it wasn't even a little fun.  I should have shoved then a bit further under the bed after Peter Murphy. 

I suffer so for fashion. Particularly when I step on it.

I find it strange that my phone suggests a certain very offensive racial slur as a spelling possibility, but doesn't recognize the word puke.  (I have kids, the subject comes up.)

I find my politics narrowing my fast food chicken choices. (I don't give my money to anti-choice or homophobic establishments whenever possible.)  So no Chick Fillet. Now Dominos does chicken.  I have to wonder if the hormones on chicken turn people into clinic bombing Christian maniacs or If crazies just like chicken. Which came first, the chicken or the nut?

On the subject of religion, why do people tell me to fake religion?  Very often, when I inform someone I am an atheist, I am told I should say I am an agnostic.  I am not an agnostic.  I am not afraid that I should hedge my bets by faking a vague belief in the supernatural.  I am relatively certain that if there is some form of omniscient being or beings, they would be aware I was faking it.  I am hoping that if there is some supernatural world, my not being an antitheist will suffice.  However, I don' t see where lying would be better.  People want me to say it to make them more comfortable.  Its a strange social phenomenon.  They also tend to demand that I state that it is possible that there is a god.  It is possible that there is an easter bunny.  However, I find the possibility so incredibly remote that I don't really feel the need to state it. 

Good Girl

I love when I make his toes curl. That little pat on the head "you're so good at that, best I've ever had" moment. It's my smiling happy thought the whole day through.

Yesterday was fun. Went out with him and our friend E for arabian ay a new place. E rocks cause hes always up to try a new restaurant. And cause he rocks in general.

I work in a professional building. On the second floor. The bathrooms require a key.

So why the hell are there feathers all over the floor? It looks like someone shot a chicken I'm there.

Which, of course, makes me think of this horrid porno I saw in a hotel room a long time ago. The chick just rubbing a feather boa all over herself and kept repeating "feathers" in the creepiest fake sexy voice ever. If you have an obscure fetish, you get the last chicken in the shop if porn I guess. You would think the harder to find would pay better so attract higher quality.

What would I know though? I'm strictly amateur and strictly his. You dont get much more specialized than that.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Hookah Dreams and the Needle

So he got a new hookah.  It takes care of the whole tobacco craving issue AND the whole always wanting a nice hookah issue with one shot.  It so smooth.  He got double apple and cheery tobaccos.  Next experiment will be boiling up some cinnamon sticks, allspice and nutmeg, strain and use that water with the double apple tobacco. I have to figure out what I can do to infuse an essence of chocolate or vanilla to try with the cherry tobacco.  Though actually the other mix will work just as well for either an apple or cherry pie taste.

And no calories.

So my best friend and I went to get tattoos yesterday.  Well, technically, I went to get one, since she just got a new one on her neck the day before.  But I talked her into 2 more while we were there.  I finally have my daughter's zodiac on my left ankle to match her brother's zodiac on the right.  I picked a design by the same artist that had done the base of the one for my son, but I didn't alter this design.

I love sitting for a tattoo.  I know people think its painful.  I guess it is, but being a painslut, I don't really process it that way.  Its all endorphins that end in artwork and wonderful.

Paint By Numbers Slave Girl and Still Getting Laid

Today is a new tattoo day.  He likes chicks with tattoos, so I get to have them.  Other kid's sign, other ankle.  Which I guess means no ankle restraints for a bit.  Oh no... he will have to hang me off the door today instead.  I hate that helpless feeling of having my hands over my head unable to cover myself, like some side of meat.

Hate it in the "oh no don't throw me in that briar patch" kind of I really like it sort of way.  For some reason, the feeling of arms over my head is just that much more intense when I am standing up at the time. Perhaps because when laying down, whichever side is resting on the bed/table/floor is protected somehow, whereas when hanging up, reaching the other side or even just a simple flip is so easy.

My next tattoo after this one is his name on my ass, but that has to wait for my birthday.  Pout. There would be more pouting if my birthday weren't in 2 weeks.

Hey wait a sec... on my ass.  No spankings/paddlings for a bit after that.  I should mention to him we should get all that in before... wouldn't want them to miss a spot because they mistake bruises for ink. 

Then comes the challenge of maintaining a career acceptable level of tattoos.

Pretty soon, we will hit 7 years together.  I was thinking how important sexual compatibility is today.  We are extremely compatible in that department.  We have both been in situations with incompatible partners before. I spent a year celibate in a marriage with a man who to this day thinks I am frigid.  Yep, the kinky nympho kind of frigid?  Foreplay and skill... does wonders for that.  He has been with women so boring he would actually just stop after awhile, without cumming, and go do something else more interesting - like laundry.

We don't have that problem. 

We still go at it like rabbits.

Rabbits aren't really aggressive enough to be the right animal to accurately describe our sex life.

We still go at it like wolverines.


I have a magic wolverine cunt.

Dear Asshats:

An open letter to the legion of morons self diagnosing their own mental illnesses on the internet, then claiming to suffer from said disorder as an excuse to be immature, stupid, annoying, selfish or any number if irritating things - KNOCK IT OFF! No one believes you. If anyone but a licensed doctor, including yourself, decides you have a "disorder", including bi-polar, oppositional defiance, etc., what you have is "full of shit lying childish asshole syndrome".

The cure? Stop being an asshole and cultivate something genuine about yourself people can find interesting. If make believe medical conditions are the best you can do, please die. Now. The planet needs the resources for people who aren't totally worthless.

If the only thing"interesting" about you is made up, you are worthless to the human race.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Dina Flower Collar Day 1

St. Patricks Day

Safety Tip: Don't Wear Your Collar So Tight It Cuts Off Circulation to the Brain

I do not subscribe to the belief that a slave is a reflection of their owner, unless their owner has to raise them... like a child.  I was a sane, functional adult when my owner collared me.  At no point did a collar cause my brain to melt and ooze out of my ear, leaving me incapable of higher brain function.  Nor did it reset me to childhood, requiring me to be trained in not only his preferences, but basic life function.

Apparently, this is rarer than one would expect.

I find that somewhat disturbing.  I find the suggestion that slavery causes your brain to go squirting out of your head and negates all life experience depressing.

And completely inapplicable to my life.

Bugged

After all these years, it stopped working between us.  I just couldn't take the new changes.  It was time to split up.

I dropped out of Weight Watchers.

The new "Points Plus" plan doesn't work.  I put on weight.  The other people I know who were in WW are having exactly the same problem.  Points Plus turned out to be Pounds Plus.

What can I say, I am not a slavishly loyal consumer.  I drop products if they don't work for me, even if I bought them for a really long time.

And it seems I am not the only one.  There may be people Pounds Plus... umm Points Plus works for.  I haven't met any. 

So... moving on, I picked up a Body Bugg.  I'm a geek, I am taking a geek approach now.  I got used to it rather quickly, much to my surprise.  We shall see how well it works.  Counting calories in is rather simple.  This helps me really track calories out.  From there on it, its a matter of simple math.

And its the perfect diet management approach for a slave.  At any point during the day, my owner can text me to update my Bugg and he can log on and see how much I have eaten and what my calorie output for the day is.  Good data management makes for good slave management.

And come on... its just hot!

Mental Notes

1.  Gypsy Jewelry is my favorite and if they ever stop doing FLARF I will probably stop going to FLARF alltogether.

2.  Mead is yummy.

3.  I really wish Tucker and Dale Fight Evil would get an American distributor already.

4.  If you put on a canceled show that only had one season and put it on the science channel with a physicist talking about the science behind the ideas, it tickles my geeky happy spot.

5.  We will never catch up with the stuff on the DVR.

6.  Master ROCKS.  I <3 my new washer and refrigerator.

7.  Yes, I am apparently domesticated sufficiently to be excited by household appliances.  

8.  It gets REALLY gross under said appliances. 

9.  At this point I carry a Droid phone, a nook and an iPod on me almost all the time.  I am turning into a fucking cyborg.  A fucking cyborg with a 37 pound purse.

10.  37!  In a row?

Quiet Time?

Day off.  No kids.  Finished the chores I needed finish.

So...

Faire?  Shop at my pace?

Or more WoW?

Movie?

New tattoo?


So many options!

The Inherent Failure Within the Gorean Community

I've been asked a few times why I no longer use the label "Gorean" to describe our lifestyle.

While the ideals portrayed in the Gor novels are no different than the underlying ideals of any dogmatic culture, in practice, the Gorean subculture employs an instant effortless position of power over others approach towards males that, ultimately, results in the community acting as a haven for the inherently inferior males unable to scramble to a position of power elsewhere, weakening the community as a whole.  Association with an increasingly inferior community grows less, not more, attractive with time.

The predominant Gorean subculture viewpoint of the underlying philosophy of the Gor novels interprets the meaning as male supremacy.  This would be a "cliff notes" version of the actual philosophical content of the series with regard to the balance of Master and slave in each individual and in the community as a whole.  An easier source for the direct ideals is found in Aristotle's writings on the Natural Slave, which addresses the philosophy without the fictional trappings.  It also allows for a hierarchy determined not solely by sex, but also taking into account intelligence and natural ability.  This key aspect, missing from the Gorean lifestyle, is the fundamental flaw in the Gorean lifestyle as practiced. 

Losers can, and do, thrive in the Gorean community.

The Gorean lifestyle does not require any showing of intelligence or ability to become "Master".  Rather, one must simply be male, or as the majority of the "Gorean community" takes place solely online, one may simply claim to be male, and they will be treated as inherently "superior" to the females of the community.  The net effect of this effortless "superiority" approach is that it is more frequent to come across those that were rejected from other communities that employed some minimum standard or vetting process, or those that are too lazy to put any actual thought into their "Mastery", than those that have a working understanding of the philosophy that they claim to follow.  It is notable that it is often the case that those that claim to follow Gorean philosophy are intellectually incapable of understanding Aristotle, or even Lange, and simply follow a simplified dogmatic structure dictated by other members of the Gorean community without ever actually internalizing the philosophy on any level whatsoever.  Much like parrots, they can quote the books ad nauseum, but very few are capable of actually understanding them on anything but a superficial level.

Many that do quickly choose to disassociate themselves with the "Gorean" community in time.  Not necessarily the underlying philosophy itself, but rather is legion of misguided substandard losers.

You will often hear i't said by Gorean "free" in their instruction to slaves that the reason you refer to all "free" as "Master/Mistress" is a reflection of the slave's position rather than a reflection of anything about the "free" in question.  The follow up concept "because there is a better than slight chance that there isn't anything to respect about said 'free' that would cause you to do so for any reason except social expectation" is rarely expressed, and quickly and loudly shouted down when it is.  Were that concept to be expressed too often, the house of cards falls.

This is the last thing you want if you do not like Goreans.  Without that social group, those from the bottom of the barrel get mixed back in with the rest of us.  Goreans can generally be avoided now by not intentionally venturing into their circle.  But much like the death of Jerry Garcia caused a flood of Deadheads back into the world, were the Gorean culture to fall apart, the wider BDSM community would suddenly find itself swamped with Goreans with nowhere else to go.

Right now, they are wearing the sign, and doing so voluntarily.  If you look at it like a warning label, the existence of the Gorean community is a great boon.

So what did you do for Valentine's Day?

Yeah... he rocks.

He rocks a LOT. 


Not to mention the 100 year old fortune cards for my tarot collection.

Sometimes I am a very spoiled pet.

Machete

I <3 this movie.

I <3 any movie that starts with multiple decapitations in the first few minutes.

Or has Cheech Marin as a priest.

On a side note.... what the fuck is going on with Steven Segal's hair?!?!?

Expendables

There is more bad plastic surgery in this movie than on ladies' night at a trendy bar in Boca on a Friday night.

I didn't think that was even possible.

Why does anyone, ever, think this shit makes them look better?

Just When I Thought I Was Out...

The holidays are finally over.  Leaving with the occasional spare moment to breathe.

And like an idiot I downloaded the 10 day free trial of WoW and got all crackhead addicted again, filling up those rare spare seconds.

I never learn.


No New Year's Resolutions.  I don't do them.